What I Need...Apparently

A friend sent one of those meme thingies this week, and it turned out to provide a giggle or two. The idea is to type in a google search with the phrase "yourname needs" in the search box. Then copy the first ten hits. Interesting results; here are mine:

Cammy needs...
1. to drool again
2. ...a lot more.
3. to fucking jump against low tigerts
4. someone his own age to play with so he will leave his brother alone
5. to win a scholarship to stay in ballet school
6. a comeback.
7. to come in and warm up.
8. more encouragement to click on the Reply button
9. his eyes checked.
10. a supercharger.

I drool enough as it is, thank you (#1), but I do need a lot more of something (#2) (maybe the supercharger (#10). The idea of me in a tutu (#5) is a howler, and of course, the gender for myself and my sibling is wrong (#4 #9). Most of the rest are fairly accurate.

Does anyone know what a "tigert" is?

Bye for now,
Cammy